Najib Without Pity
Hello there.
I’ve decided to take on the responsibility of reviewing Najib’s posting history thus far, in the style of Television Without Pity. For the sake of the children, of course. No task is too great when it’s being done for the children.
Note that it was over a month before his next post. Thus, it was definitely not “real soon”. Whether it was “something good” is debatable.
Of course, it should be said that Najib knows nothing about actually being a nice guy and can therefore make such comments.
Right. Because this phrase has never been used in an article about Survivor before.
Yeah, that happens to me when I watch Survivor too.
“Solomon.”
Just like previous winners Reuben and Fantasia!
Perhaps if they weren’t 1) on drugs or 2) crazy, they would not have lost ground. It would also help if they didn’t suck.
What he means is, he looks forward to hearing it when he downloads it off the Internet.
I’m not sure Najib can make comments about other people being annoying cheese balls. Also Bo was busted for cocaine, a must for any “pure” rocker.
Cocaine’s a helluva drug.
Not strictly accurate.
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=yodel
yo•del P Pronunciation Key (y d l)
v. yo•deled, or yo•delled yo•del•ing, or yo•del•ling yo•dels or yo•dels
v. intr.
To sing so that the voice fluctuates rapidly between the normal chest voice and a falsetto.
Yeah. She’s a little bit country, and he’s a little bit rock & roll. Who’da thought?
Wow. So it really doesn’t take much to blow your mind huh?
Dude #1: “Dude, did you watch the American Idol season finale last night?”
Dude #2: “Yeah man, it like totally blew my mind!”
Dude #3: “I concur. Mind blowing is the only adjective powerful enough to describe the extremities of emotions I experienced upon watching it. “
Maybe if the finale were held in a friggin’ crashing helicopter and viewers had to call in to vote who they would save from the smouldering wreckage, mind-blowing would be more accurate. Extreme!
I don’t think Najib has the right to complain about anybody’s hair.
Once again, I don’t think Najib has the right to complain about anybody’s clothes.
Also, keep in mind Anthony Kiedis has in the past performed wearing nothing but a tube sock.
“Wear one”
I think that your reviews, while technically proficient, don’t hold up to close scrutiny. You have potential, but ultimately require far more practice and less hyperbole. Also, you need to watch things that have scripts and acting. I mean besides Survivor and American Idol.

May 22nd, 2005 at 3:22:53 am
Thank you Mr Perfect for your critique! I’m glad you got a kick out of reading my articles! And thanks so much for pointing out my inaccuracies because I realise how spicing up my reviews with hyperbole can really irritate you! So watch this space for more interesting content! And happy reading Mr Perfect!
May 22nd, 2005 at 1:50:11 pm
Actually, as a Mass Comms student you should understand that overuse of cliches and hyperbole can make that much less of a credible writer.
May 24th, 2005 at 1:18:00 am
Hyperballs.. nice review of a review..
May 24th, 2005 at 9:58:26 am
Noooo noooo, as a Mass Comm diploma-holder I reeeaaallly didn’t know that overuse of cliches and hyperbole can make me much less of a credible writer. Like I reeaallly didn’t know that and I needed someone to tell me. So thanks. Maybe I should write for News of the World instead.
May 24th, 2005 at 11:34:45 am
Your sarcasm needs work as well.
*ba dum ching!*
May 24th, 2005 at 6:31:37 pm
So show me…
May 24th, 2005 at 9:28:19 pm
Girls, girls. Why are we fighting?
Come together and let’s dance to Jackson 5.
May 24th, 2005 at 9:55:47 pm
I’ll reach out my hand to you
I’ll have faith in all you do
Just call my name and I’ll be there
May 25th, 2005 at 1:07:18 am
Who says we’re fighting? Winda, my love, this is how ~Z~ n I communicate. We just ‘beat’ the shit out of each other. Keep your eyes peeled for juicy reviews on Survivor: Guatemala come September! Till then…survive through all the non-reality rubbish they show on TV!
May 25th, 2005 at 9:11:30 pm
najib. they should start a new reality show which gets ppl in groups of five and impersonate the Jackson 5. They should call it The Jackson 5 Revival Contest.
May 30th, 2005 at 11:20:10 am
you guys just crack me up man . . .
May 31st, 2005 at 12:43:03 am
Reading this again, I just realised… what the heck are clothes sponsored by the Red Cross supposed to look like anyway?
May 31st, 2005 at 12:45:24 am
What Najib meant is that he says some rubbish that he can’t back up, and I call him on it.
May 31st, 2005 at 2:53:33 am
The bimbo has landed - what’s a hyperbole? *too lazy to check dictionary or linguistic manual type thingy*
May 31st, 2005 at 9:06:01 pm
hyperbole
A new reader! Hurrah!