make it so
Artist’s rendering of teleportation process

A Singaporean scientist is the first person in the world to develop an affordable form of instantaneous teleportation. Teleportation, which refers to the moving of objects from one location to another almost instantaneously and without the use of conventional transportation, had previously only been the realm of science fiction but no more. While successful attempts at teleportation have been made in the past, only light particles have been involved.

Professor Sian Lan Lan, a Singaporean scientist born and raised in Lan-Chou in the Kansu province of China, recently conducted a successful experiment that allowed him to transport himself from Woodlands to Johore Bahru and back. Professor Sian’s teleportation system uses experimental wormhole technology that cannot fully be explained here for security reasons. The procedure is not without its hiccups though, as some pirated DVDs mysteriously materialised in his possession upon his return to Singapore. Professor Sian said that such setbacks were part and parcel of the scientific process, but on the whole the experiment appeared to have gone off without a hitch.

Professor Sian credits the Singaporean government with giving him the motivation to complete this daunting scientific endeavour. “With the rising costs of transportation, is it any wonder that I made this important discovery? Public transportation keeps getting more and more expensive and it’s even more expensive to drive a car. So I feel this is a win-win situation both for the scientific community and the general public in Singapore and around the world.”

In other news, the LTA is lo0king into ways of charging commuters for every atom transported during the teleportation process.

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